DEA Watch Think Piece: Know Thy Enemy?


Special Report: Just the facts

21 Dec 2003, 22:04 PST, 6th Edition

Sunday Evening Think Piece: Know Thy Enemy

      I have been so impressed with the content of the various think piece writer's over the years that I thought I would take a stab at writing one myself. Here goes...

      You know sumpin'... everybody likes to whine about why we have so many wars but nobody offers good suggestions for avoiding wars. Well, yours truly has studied the matter and I am now prepared to provide what I think is the best suggestion not only for avoiding wars but for ending this silly war on terrorism that is really nothing more than wag the f**king dog till he wags himself to death.

      If we look back in history we find that every a**hole who started a war of global impact never left the shores of his continent and most of them never traveled far outside of their country.

      Hitler, Stalin, Tojo, Milosovic, Saddam, Khadafi, Osama... none of these tinpot dictators traveled to the United States before embarking on their world conquest dreams against us. Japanese Admiral Isoruku Yamamoto was the only senior Axis advisor who traveled extensively around the U.S. prior to WW2. Yamamoto tried in vain to advise against his country attacking Pearl Harbor. None of Hitler's henchmen traveled to America... and they paid the price for failing to heed the second most important rule of war: know well thy enemy. Had Hitler visited the United States and traveled to only one of our prospering steel mills World War II would never have happened.

      Our invasion of Iraq could have been avoided if Saddam Hussein was offered a full guarantee of absolute and irrevocable security to come visit the U.S. and take a look at the industrial might of our country... as well as take a look at our poor communities to see where our enlisted class of military people come from. Had Saddam been extended full diplomatic immunity and security to visit U.S. industrial sites as well as see for himself that the people we would send against him viewed that opportunity as the biggest thing that could happen to them in their entire lives, Saddam would have changed his ways post haste.

      We find ourselves in wars because we have morons in the White House who fail to understand or appreciate the stupidity of the leaders we fight. Taft was an imbecile who refused to even discuss the League of Nations concept advocated by Professor Wilson, let alone invite Biscmarck and Ludendorff to the U.S. for a site seeing trip. Hoover, like the two Bush's, was so dimwitted and bent on enriching his rich friends he never contemplated offering Herr Hitler an official tour of our country... Hitler came to power the same year as the man who replaced Hoover. Clinton was more interested in pu**y than he was in straightening out the problems caused by the Bush and Cheney oil saboteurs screwing up relations in the Middle East. And when Bush Jr. got elected his mind had already been made up to grab Iraq's oil.

      Now, at this precise moment, Jr. Bush is feeling his oats. He's eaten more than his share of Wheaties. He's watched a few military movies over the weekend, and now he's ready to begin a new and more vigorous hunt for Osama. This new hunt will quite probably result in the death or deportation of president Kharzai who will suddenly find his remaining in Afghanistan untenable.

      But all of this can easily be avoided if we simply arrange for Osama or his representative to go to the podium at the UN and say what's on his mind... answer questions, then be free to return to whence he came with no bugs attached to his luggage and no Sherlocks shadowing his footsteps.

      Osama's victory on 09/11/2001 was a testament to the rule "Know Thy Enemy". Osama used us against ourselves. That's why we feel so stupid and so incapable of dealing with the terrorist threat. We are, simply, too arrogant, racist, and self-superior to acknowledge that people we have always viewed as racially, religiously and culturally inferior to us are as smart as we are. But on 09/11 Osama proved to be smarter. He used our own equipment against us. And if he can do it once, he can do it again and again and again.

      Now we must learn from our enemy and employ some of his wisdom. Osama doesn't really want to destroy the United States. He merely wants to cut a deal so that our people and his people can live together... something we have already capitulated on when we agreed to his demand to withdraw our military forces from Saudi Arabia... something we should have done a long, long time ago if not for our greedy oil companies and their racist employees who dissed everybody who wasn't white like them. (I remember well when JFK ordered the military to remove its listening posts and nukes from Turkey. Because our military dragged its feet we almost ended up in a situation that could have destroyed the world. Those nukes, BTW, were removed after the Cuban Missile "crises".)

      And now we're practicing the same arrogance in Iraq. We have shifted a lot of our oil workers from Texas and Saudi Arabia to Iraq. They are all white and they are all arrogant. Hispanic, Asian and African Americans are rejected for foreign employment by our oil companies in Saudi Arabia or Iraq. The few non-white employees working for those companies are working at window desks.

      I remember back when DEA was forced to accept that it could not remain an all-white agency. In the 30 years since DEA's creation when it started with only two African American agents and one female agent DEA has grown to include minorities in every job classification. And if DEA can make the corrections it needed to make so can our foreign relations. Having an impotent African-American at DOS and another impotent black person at the UN is not enough. Everyone knows that Colin Powell and Kofi Annan are nothing more than white people trapped in black bodies. What we need to do to resolve our differences with Al-Queda and our angry opponents in Iraq is to cut a deal with them they can't refuse, but also find profitable. But we'll never be able to do that when the only faces they are allowed to deal with are the same white faces that have been exploiting and abusing them for decades... added to George Bush's "you're either with us or against us" threat that -- not surprisingly-- hasn't stopped our GI's in Iraq being shot to s**t.

      It's bad enough that we worship paintings and statues of a white Jesus Christ who, miraculously, was the only blond-haired and blue-eyed person born in a land of dark-skinned, brown-eyed people. It's worse that we continue to be so arrogant that we refuse to live in the real world which must eventually accept our declared enemies as co-humans.

      Once upon a time we invited Nikita Kruschev to the UN to speak his mind. Nikita pounded his shoe on the podium and promised to bury our grandparent's grandchildren. But within a very short time Nikita was gone, not long after he was demoted to working in his vegetable garden. He died an unceremonious death, deemed a non-person. Nikita's death precipitated the end of Soviet communism. Their remaining years were but only a last gasp... a round of musical chair Stalin-wannabes. Belch. Russian communism is gone, toast.

      We need to give Osama or his rep guaranteed protection at a UN microphone to tell a full UN assembly what's pissing him off.


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